Healthy Grieving Steps

Have you experienced a parent passing away? Or perhaps you want to know how to prepare yourself to grieve in the healthiest of ways to make it through pain. I hope some of these steps and tips can help you whether the loss of a parent or loved one has happened or will happen.

There are no exact strategies that work for everyone, but there are some that should work in some regard as you find what works best for you.

The first place to start is allowing yourself to feel. There may be a range of emotions, such as sadness, anger, loss, shock, or more. Sitting down in a quiet space and thinking about the person and allowing yourself to check in with your body, your heart, mind or soul. You can experience your emotions in whatever way is most authentic to you. If you have a hard time getting in touch with those emotions, try writing down your thoughts and feelings about the person and that will help guide you.

Some people think they need to grieve alone or only in private, but it is helpful to move through the grieving process by talking about it with other supportive people. So, surround yourself with supportive people who care about you, and let them know how you feel and what is going through your mind. If you find that you are having a hard time functioning in day-to-day living, search out the help of a counselor trained in healing grief.

Making sure you take care of yourself may sound simple, but it can be difficult during shock, grief, or compartmentalizing behaviors. Stop and ask yourself what you need for your mental/emotional health, physical health, and spiritual health. Your answers may be hard to come by, so if you are feeling stuck on any of those categories. Mental and emotional health might require time to do the above-mentioned items, it could mean not going to work, letting go of some responsibilities temporarily, not adding more stress to your plate, or more. Physical health is making sure you are eating well, sleeping well (but not oversleeping), and not eating to deal with your feelings. Spiritual health can mean how is your relationship with God or higher power, and spending time talking with Him and listening, praying prayers for the recently departed or sick, and asking others to pray for you.

One more piece that can be helpful, is doing something of a ceremonial nature to remember and honor your parent or loved one. From holding a service, to having people share their memories, to lighting a candle or visiting their favorite place. You could also write a letter to the person or make something that reminds you of them that you can look back on. Everyone’s journey is unique, so be patient with yourself as well. Know that whatever you are feeling will pass with time, and that is okay.