Top 5 Things to do to Start Healing Any Addiction
Do you know someone struggling with compulsive behaviors? It might be an addiction and very difficult to find healing. After years of working as a certified multiple addiction therapist, I have noticed some very strong similarities in treatment. There is a lot of crossover, no matter what the substance or behavior is, so hopefully these 5 things help in the recovery journey:
Eliminate access as much as possible. It may seem straightforward, but finding ways to not go near alcohol, gaming, pornography, etc is easier said than done. But one of the very first things that I tell everyone in recovery is that we need to eliminate their access as much as possible. How are they getting the behavior or substance? What lengths are they willing to make it difficult or impossible to access? If it’s alcohol they may need to give up their credit cards or ability to make purchases. If it’s pornography, they need blocking software with a good accountability partner (we will get to that next), if it’s a drug or something else finding ways to eliminate privacy temporarily. This could mean something as substantial as an inpatient treatment facility or perhaps taking a door off a bedroom or no phone/internet access. Eliminating access will not be a cure-all, but it will start the journey to a compulsion free life.
A good accountability system. Researcher Alexandre Laudet, 2002 found that there was a high correlation with good accountability to long-term recovery. Often, in order to eliminate access you need people to help prop that system up. You may need someone to hold a password to your computer or software, or your wallet. You will need someone to call when you are feeling tempted to act out, someone that you can call any time for support and knows what you are going through without judgment. A support group is often the best place to find that you are not alone.
Replace the behavior or substance. Just stopping the behavior does not mean you will not go back given the chance. You need to replace one unhealthy coping strategy with a healthier coping strategy. If you take something away it creates a vacuum (think physics), and if you don’t fill it with something it will pull in the nearest thing it can find to create equilibrium. Find something that gives the same positive emotion that is received from the substance or behavior. Remember it is not the substance or behavior that is addictive, it is the emotion the brain associated with that behavior or substance. If it was the substance itself, everyone who tried alcohol would become an alcoholic. Some exceptions may exist with extreme substances like heroin.
Identify your triggers. There is either a positive emotion that is being carved or a negative emotion that is being avoided. Find out which, or if it’s both, and you will be one step closer to healing by replacing one unhealthy behavior with a healthier one. If watching pornography makes someone feel special, find other ways to feel special or valued. If someone is smoking to avoid stress, find other ways to process anxieties. Therapy can help with this as well.
Get good sleep, diet, and exercise. If you are reading this far then you may have heard but these factors make a big difference to balance out the chemicals in the brain and give the best chance of healing. The mind and body are connected so as you take care of one, the other can be affected as well.
All of these things can be tough to do by yourself, so please do seek out the support of a trained therapist who has specialized training and experience in these areas. You are worth getting better for and it is possible.